The ministry of Civil service affairs (CSA) has recently launched a campaign to promote discipline and quality services because some civil servants thought they were untouchable and not accountable. The latter have been told to be ?more active and efficient?. This intervention has been regarded as threatening and intimidating. Some discontented civil servants have decided to ask for ?early retirement?. Others have consulted their trade unions.

According to ministry officials, the objective of the CSA is to enhance the efficiency and productivity seen as lacking in the government sector. This paper, which identifies five categories of public servants, wishes to help the latter have an insight into themselves. Though developed after observing some government organizations in Mauritius, this model does not deduce that the government sector is per se unproductive.

One could ask: ?Why only the public sector? Does not the model hold good for the private sector?? Unlike the government sector, which is ?hierarchy-oriented?, the private sector is ?market-oriented?. Irrespective of type or size, there are two words around which private organizations revolve: ?profit maximisation?. This mantra is handed down to every strata and every employee knows by heart the austere equation governing his/her life: ?Perform you stay, fail you leave?. This equation would have eliminated some of the five categories described below, if they existed in the private sector.

1. YES-MEN (OR WOMEN). They always approve whatever is done and said by their superiors. The yes-man?s history goes as far as the history of governments. Once a king declared that brinjals were good for health. All his ministers agreed. Some days later, he declared brinjals bad for health and none of his ministers disagreed. The king consulted an old priest about his ministers? double standards. He replied: ?We eat the salt of yours and not that of brinjals?.

Never underestimate a yes-man?s capacity to stick to his ?principles?. I once overheard the CEO of a government organization giving a harsh lecture to a subordinate in public. He ended saying: ?Tommy, you?re the most useless, inefficient, incompetent, pathetic and hopeless idiot I have ever come across in my life!? Guess what Tommy - a senior public officer - did. He bowed his head, saying: ?Yes Sir, thank you, Sir? and left sheepishly smiling as if nothing had happened!

Yes-men are dangerous and mostly for their superiors. If you hold a high position in the public sector, remember this. Your most vicious enemies are not those who openly fight or criticize you, but those who praise you in public. Once you lose your position, they will find another master to serve. What attracts a yes-man is power. If you don't have power, just forget having a ring of yes-men around you.

2. NO-MEN (OR WOMEN). They are also easy to identify. They oppose any move by management. If the latter decides to paint a building green, they will oppose it, saying it is done to satisfy the present government. If it is to be painted white, they will say it is due to the World Bank pressure on management. If it is not painted, it is because of management's inefficiency. Their logic is simple. The colour of the building or whether it gets painted does not matter. Their motto is: ALWAYS OPPOSE! It is their prime duty to PROTEST against everything. Typical examples are unionwallahs, still not so scarce in government organizations.

Sometimes, inexperienced top managers use a dangerous and stupid approach to satisfy unionwallahs. They agree to part of their demands, hoping to silence them. They cannot be more wrong! Never try to satisfy a no-man, because a no-man can never be satisfied. To be fair, sometimes yes-men are productive. On the other hand, no-men not only do nothing but they also try their best to prevent others from being productive. You cannot use power to attract no-men?

3. ZEROS. They cannot be yes-men or no-men. If you ever visit a government office, you will immediately recognize them. They take naps after lunch, read newspapers or race sheets. Sometimes government organizations purposely manufacture zeros. How? According to a theory of Michael Porter, any employee is promoted to his/her level of incompetence. Surprisingly, this theory does not hold good for government organizations where promotions are based on seniority and favouritism instead of merit. So many government servants get promoted to levels above their competence.

Again never underestimate the level of incompetence of a zero. If you have not worked in the government sector, you have no idea of their IQ levels. Here is a classic example. Mr C, an Arts graduate with 25 years? experience, trained overseas at taxpayers' expense, could not write a decent letter. Mr D, a junior officer, invariably wrote his letters. Once, Mr D was absent and a colleague?s mother died. Mr C wanted to collect money from the staff. This is the letter he wrote: ?Dear Colleagues, On behalf of the trip to Mr X?s mother?s funeral house, each of us has to contribute Rs 100 to buy the flower wreath and the vehicle. Please reimburse the same to me.? Later someone asked Mr D: ? If Mr C?s English is so bad, why the hell he does not write his letter in French?? Mr D smiled: ?His French is even worse!?

4. SMARTIES. This category is quite invisible. They are invisible, because they are smart? Like Zeros, Smarties are ?produced? by organizations, but in the opposite way. For some reason, competent officers are denied promotions they deserve and are stuck in positions too little for them. Therefore they remain unproductive. Some do not even appreciate promotion, as it will make them lose productive hours in their out-of-the-office work.

5. LEADERS. If the country has survived and some work is done satisfactorily, it is entirely due to them. They are called leaders because they lead the government sector though they are very few. True leaders are genuinely interested in their work. In spite of all the red tape, they try their best for the common good. It is not difficult to differentiate leaders from the other categories. They talk little about their work and are the most envied and hated in their departments. Still, they exist and fortunately some still work in the government sector.

During my brief tenure there, I had the privilege of working under a few leaders. It would be impertinent to name them but this article is a tribute to those real leaders. I firmly believe that, if the country had to rely only on civil servants to achieve progress in various fields such as education, IT, tourism, industry, etc. it would have long gone bankrupt. We owe a lot to the private sector, which keeps delivering the goods.

by Ahmad MACKY