Everything is ready for the Royal Raid of 2008. On 3rd and 4th May, two mountain trail running events of 35kms and 100km will be held across the South West of the Island. The Official Web Site tells us it will be, ?A fantastic mountain trail run that will lead you through the heart of the island and make you discover unforgettable tropical scenery, while sharing the emotion and passion with local and international participants, in a marvellously friendly atmosphere?.

If you think that this sounds like a very enjoyable, relaxing and healthy way of seeing some beautiful sights at the weekend ? you could be wrong! After having competed last year I can say that it is a very sociable and wonderful experience. However ? the monster that is called the ?Royal Raid?, should be approached with caution. Mrs Jerret thinks that as I approach the age of 45, it might be a good time to retire from competitive sports. The only problem is that when you are as old as I am, there are very few competitive sports available to you. Gymnasts are too old at 15, tennis stars have to make it by 21, cyclists have peeked by 33 and I have (nearly) given up hope of a starring role in a ?new look? Liverpool team. If Mrs Jerret was married to David Beckham, she would find that training schedules would always have to come before shopping for diamands.

I think Jenny bases her concern for my athletic aspirations on the events of last year. She had collected a small contingent of relatives to be there at my moment of glory. They set off, to be in plenty of time at Bel Ombre, where I was going to beat all expectations, and sail across the finishing line, leading my age-group. Unfortunately, a breathless phone call, just as they were settling down for the celebrations, redirected their attention to scraping me off the track, ten miles from the finish.

So, it will soon be ? Royal Raid ? time again. All the talk is of training times and appropriate footware. Are there any new magic drinks on the market that will rehydrate, feed, refresh and strengthen and be legal enough to avoid the dope test. Being able to run, or walk, or even crawl the 35 kilometres of rugged terrain, takes some practice. It takes up a great deal of free time and needs dedication. For the lucky few who make the course ? or even pass the medical to gain an entry ? it is a way of feeling good and making those surplus pounds disappear.

<B>Exhausted but happy with hands on a cold beer</B>

Clambering up the almost vertical Parakeet trail in 35 degrees of heat and 80+ % humidity, after ten miles of forest track and road, is a challenge for all. When you have done that, you only have to run another ten miles down to the South Coast at Bel Ombre! On the other hand, imagine the self-satisfaction and pleasure, when you finish the course. Imagine sitting exhausted, but happy, with your hand on a cold beer. Imagine reflecting on the achievement of completing one of the most difficult courses in the world. I can only imagine, because, so far, I have not been able to complete the course.

Anyway, why is it called a Royal raid? Does it have some hidden Royal patronage. Does Princess Anne ride the boundary markers, on her horse? Does Prince Harry use it as a secret detox, after visiting all those night clubs in preparation for his photograph in the Sunday papers? Has the Queen herself given royal approval for this worthwhile exercise of toughening up her Commonwealth citizens? Why is it a raid? The goyaves de Chine bushes along the route certainly have a very ?raided? look when all the competitors, helpers and spectators have been through. Is it because of the ambulance assistants who make frequent ?medical raids? to bring the bodies ?out of the bush?. Damaged fibulas, twisted and torn ankles and heat exhaustion make the Black River Gorges look like the site of a major military skirmish by the end of the day.

Perhaps it should be called ?The Mauritian Mango Marathon?. The promotion could read ? ?It takes two to tango, but only real men and women can do the Mango?. It may be placed high on the list of favoured life goals for the greying, globetrotting, achievement junkies who scour the world for ?extreme? experience. A specialised tour of Mauritius could include:- walking with the lions, swimming with the dolphins, abseilingl or bungee jumping down Le Morne and running the Mango Marathon.

I do know that last year, after five and a half hours of sore footed slogging through the mountain terrain, I was defeated. It was certainly an ?unforgettable experience?. After only two thirds of the course I sat down near the top of ?The Parakeet? and thought I might have eaten my ?Last mango in Maurice?.

In truth, it was a great experience. The fact that I am looking at application forms and getting my walking legs moving again means that it was an exciting day as well as a real challenge.

<B>Jules JERRET</B>