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?I?m very sorry you feel that way?
The British Council?s language clinic with ?Dr Danny?
Hello, and welcome to The British Council?s English Language Clinic. This week I would like to discuss three questions, with the help of two fictional characters, Peter and David. Firstly, ?when is an apology not an apology???when it is a ?non apology apology?. This is a statement which sounds like an apology but is actually a way to avoid admitting responsibility or guilt. For example, Peter offended David by telling him that his wife had very manly hands (which is untrue, she has very feminine hands). David demanded an apology; Peter told David? ?I am very sorry that you have been offended.? I hope you noticed that Peter did not apologise for making the initial comment, he simply offered his condolences that David felt offended; what he gave was a classic ?non apology apology?.
My second question is ?when is a denial not a denial???when it is a ?non denial denial?. For example, in retaliation for Peter?s previous comments, David painted Peter?s dog red (the dog rather liked it but Peter was not happy). Peter went to David?s house and accused him of having painted his dog. David told Peter? ?That is totally absurd!? I hope you noticed that David did not deny painting the dog (many things are both absurd and true); what he offered was a ?non denial denial?.
The third question I would like to ask is ?when is a fish not a fish???actually this question is not important. I wanted to distract your attention for a few seconds whilst I thought about how I would end this article. Questions and statements which are designed to divert or distract attention are known as ?red herrings? (they are not a type of fish!).
There are many, many examples of ways in which language is used to confuse and mislead (obfuscation). So, next time you accuse someone of having painted your dog (or fish) red, listen very carefully to the language they use.
Please send your comments, queries and questions to ?Dr Danny? at the British Council Language Clinic by emailing the following address [email protected]
To find out more about the uses of English, please contact the British Council by phoning 403 0200.
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