The scene is a company?s end of year party in a high class hotel. Colleagues are interacting joyfully around a free choice of drinks and delicious upmarket buffet menu. The characters: Al and Cohol, employees of the company.

Cohol: Hi , Al, how is life, man? We work for the same company, yet we only meet at the end of year party? Let?s have a drink.

Al : Indeed Cohol, time flies so fast with work and family responsibilities. (Turns towards the barman). May I have a virgin colada, please?

Cohol: You mean pina colada, don?t you?

Al: No, a virgin colada? I am driving.

Cohol: Stop your nonsense, Al. You live just a few miles away. I?ll follow you if you want but please have a drink. By the way, you seem to forget there is a protector for each drunk driver?

Al: Sorry Cohol, things have changed now. There is no such absurdity as a guardian angel for drunk drivers. When they fail to cause an accident it?s only by chance . Life is sacred and I refuse to bet on it? Time flies fast enough Cohol, no need to add wings to it with drinks at the wheel.

Cohol : Oh! Oh! Mr Al, the partygoer, is now a preacher and philosopher!

I came here to chill out man and I?ll go for it, with or without you. I know I can stand alcohol and so do you.

Al : If you are driving, I strongly recommend you refrain from drinking?

There are other ways of having fun and the food is excellent! It?s no time to play with the police Cohol. If you?re caught with more than 50mg alcohol /100ml of blood, be ready for a fine ranging from Rs 10,000 to Rs 25,000 as it would be your first offence.

Cohol: Do you mean that much for a couple of drinks?

Al: Yes! Those who reoffend are looking at fines ranging from Rs 20,000 to Rs 50,000 not to mention the risks of jail sentences and withdrawal of driving licence! And if you?re unlucky enough to be involved in a fatal accident while driving under the influence, you can expect up to three years in prison!

Cohol: I have some supermint candies that will fool them Al? and we?ll have some strong coffee before leaving.

Al: I fear there is no magic formula to get rid of alcohol, my friend. Only time can eliminate it from our system. The average person metabolises about 1 standard drink (10 g) per hour! If you have to get rid of all the drinks you expect to have before driving, you should be ready to stay here till tomorrow afternoon.

Cohol: No thank you Al. I think you are right, when trouble is sleeping better not tease it! It will be my first alcohol-free end of year party. Next year I?ll leave the car home and call my taxi driver, Sober.

Al: All right, we?ll share the bill. I won?t drive either, but until then let?s go on to the buffet, the food must be as delicious as it looks and smells!

Al and Cohol wish you an alcohol-free steering wheel for a trouble-free Christmas and New Year!

Alain JEANNOT